Am I a Blogger?

For the majority of my day....I've spent reading this girls blog who has cancer. She wouldn't know who I was if I hit her with my car...but after reading about her all day, I feel like she could be my best friend. She is maybe a year older then me, she is battling lymphoma cancer....and she is my inspiration.
I don't know how someone with such a traumatic event going on in her life, could be so cheery, inspiring, and pure?
I barely know her....ok I don't know her at all...I've probably passed her in the hallways of good ol' THS back in the day, but we have never spoken a word to each other. But she has made me think about a lot of things in my life. It made me appreciate....

I haven't 'blogged' in awhile...I don't think I'm true 'blogger'....nor do I know what a true 'blogger' entails. Ok, enough with the quotes. I write to get some of the 24/7 thinking going on in my head, out on paper, or in this case my shiny pink dell laptop ;) No one reads this...and sometimes I wonder if I should share this with those that are close to me, as to help them understand why I'm such a beast some days. Haha.

So Cody has left to go to training for the Air Force. It's been awhile since my last complaint on life, and since then, he's sworn in, yet again to the United States Military, this time the Air Force. It's been almost 3 weeks since he's left for TX....and I think our departure this time around has gotten a little bit easier for me. Yes being apart sucks....but I feel like this will be an easier phase then what we've been through, and hopefully it will get easier from now on. Maybe the fact that he's not in a foreign country, with things blowing up around him plays a major factor in that....but still I'm hoping for the time to pass quickly so that we may begin yet another chapter in our life.
I never realized how much I hate my phone...yes I'm addicted to my pink blackberry, but actually talking on it? Who does that these days? Um yeah, us. I have to admit, the first couple days were like being back in 5th grade when we would awkwardly talk on the phone after school. But now we just ramble on about our day as if we were right next to each other, and I've realized that my speakerphone is more of a friend of mine, then actually holding it like an actual phone.
I do really appreciate my dear friend April...who has kept me busy and allowed me to tag along with her to her busy social life events. I don't know what I would have done if I had never met her. Thank God for that one Titans game, that I almost didn't go to, because well I lack the love for football. But I'm thankful I went, and sooo thankful to have her in my life.

I have mixed feelings about a lot. I don't think I'll truly have a 'real' feeling towards the military until we move and are on base. Or maybe it won't even hit until he deploys again...who knows. But right now, the objective of the game is to get through to July, for him to graduate, and for us to pack up and leave Music City.

Some days... all I want is to be back in CT, near my family and some of my friends. But other days, I realize that I"m learning a lot by being away from home. Even things I never even thought of, such as learning to cook all sorts of Korean dishes. I realize that not only am I learning, but my parents are learning how to deal without me as well. It does kill me sometimes to hear them struggle about simple things such as making dr.'s appt, or trying to figure out who to go to the dr.'s with them to translate. I wish I could teleport back and forth from here to CT....but I can't be there to live their life right? I do miss my mommy, and I don't even want to think about what a hot mess I'll be when we have a little bun in the oven....but I"m going to try to believe that this is all happening for a reason, and that I'm learning from it. I mean, my mom left my grandma in Korea...that can't be easy. I do miss her though. :(

Ok, now that I've talked to Cody for a good 30 minutes, I have lost all motivation to keep going with this blog...perhaps this is why I can't keep up with this, or why I'm not sharing it with anyone.

Perhaps tomorrow, I shall continue...
until then.....